It's Zenobia

I have nightmares  about the way it ended how we'll never get it  back  those moments  of open mouthed screams veins taut and pulsing  rhythmic and heated the way the light  just snuck  past the blinds so that the shadows  cast a mask across your eyes and I could see  the sun  hiding  afraid  behind the trees I toss and turn  and burn  with need to hold on tight to that time as it threatens to slip away  when I awake  in a cold sweat throat left  dry  eyes wet  with tears  chest heaving  breathing desperate ragged breaths  left sore  heart gored  gaping  taking time to recreate  reanimate  my memories stitching stills  of frozen faces  before they melt  faceless figures  sitting silent  at the tip of my tongue desperate to remember  all...

My heart starts To exhibit different Characteristics Slipping Gradually Out of me It finds  Its legs  And heads Off into some dark unknown Traversing A forest Far from  Its home  No compass  To guide it  Blinded by its own Ambitions To live in  Something greater than Myself The humble home In which its dwelled It is compelled By visions of grandeur Wishing for some pure Perfect Place To lay And stay awhile It faces Endless open places Great expanses Of empty Sadness Sadly It presses on Sinks quick In sands Hot from the sun Some Barren scope of land Leaving it numb But it is Ever strong Never done Battles brambles Thorns Sunk deep In the sweet Of this flesh And yet Still it rises Ready Steady on across Oceans Of hoping Nearly drowning As waves Break Repeatedly Not once heeding Me and my warnings Storming Through life like It sees its last Morning Just on the horizon And I am On alert For the hurt And the pieces It leaves In its wake While somehow still ...

I'm supposed to feel Guilty When he runs His fingers Inside the edge Of my waistband White cotton Pulled away From my waist While he wastes No time finding The center Of my deepest Regrets He gets me off The wrong path Wets The pavement I'm meant to be walking Talking Filth From lush lips Spills In Eardrums Judgment numbed By nimble fingers Finishing Fast As I fight To hold legs steady Underneath me Pushed back Oh so easy Melting into tempur pedic Apex Flushed Lust Heated Having Palpitations Taking Ages To form thoughts To remind my mouth How to say No How to not Moan I'm supposed to be Resisting Not lifting Hips In time to hand Gestures Wet Wet Wetter Writhing Dying Dangerously close To letting him End This I suppose I'm supposed to feel bad But he promises Endless Supplies of forgiveness I listen Intently And respond Briskly Quickly His name sticking For only a second On the roof Of my mouth Then slipping Swiftly, spilling out And I offer myself In exchange For this n...

I can still taste you, My mouth flushed, hot, and aching Waiting, needing, more

When the words Have dried Like leaves On the pavement Of my tongue Crushed Beneath my teeth I seek Some other road To speak Some other way To reach The empty Space Between Us To bring You and I Closer Under And overcast sky So that there are No shadows In your eyes No glare To break Our stare Into the infinite And secret Center Of our souls So that rain Will wash away Inhibitions So that eager lips Will find Warmth Pressed against The hearth Of hearts That beat beneath Our skin Charged like the air We breathe in As we lean in And fall Into each other And this autumn So we smell Earth and rain and wet and the things That we are made of So that skin Like the leaves Bleeds Its color Our green Intentions Blend then To the caramel Of sun kissed flesh Then sweep to a sweet Pink As a blush Touches Fevered skin Then all is lost And we Are falling Falling Free Like leaves Scattered about Dancing now At the discretion Of the wind And we are left wet And quiet On these sheets Patient Waiting Achi...

Bruise in the shape of a light switch Sits just under my shoulder blade While teeth marks, rainbow arcs of this small mouth Worn proud across his collarbone, that hollow though Left wet with Sweat and remnants of My tongue, He loves this, us, hot, swift hard against that wall With legs wrapped tight, his grip like love, so strong, Secure, sure of arms beneath these thighs, They are thirsty for his perfect pace, he strides, Smooth through like satin, sultry suffocating need, rises Deep inside of me, He likes this spontaneous nature The hurried desperate motions, So then I have to have you now, how about right here, Hands tear at clothes, hooks release, shirt comes free, Skirt hiked up high, jeans around his knees Mouth by my ear, voice barely heard, raw with ache, asking me to beg, begging me me take More of him, rocking hard against that waist, this greedy need I have to feed... it only....takes takes takes All of it, groans, growls, vowels lost inside of mouths Up and down up and down...

I am waiting Lungs  Filled with patience Debating  Whether or not to stop Lost thoughts Invading My already straying mind Will  You  Find Me  In enough time I'm sick  Tripping over this  In circles Hurdles have hit hard  The edges of my mind I'm waiting Lungs  Filled with patience Heart taken  To aiming At the bright side As the right side  Of my lips hitch In a hopeful smile  Time ticks while My tongue  Tastes your name  A memory Might be  Blamed  For the way it plays  With notes of fruit  And lust  And love And just  A touch  Of something else That sparkles  On these buds Champagne  Such Is the way it goes  To my head  Sharp  Clear  Best  Bright and clean  I'm waiting Lungs filled with patience Aching To finally breathe Your scent  Spent on my skin  Left  Long  Taking time to savor  The interim The anticipation And it...

I fell apart The good way Slow   And   Sweet   Like sugar On low heat Turning   Into something new All over you Remnants left on hands And lips And you all warm cream Steamed   Mixed   Gentle into caramel confection Having felt connections Previously Unknown to me Ones I hope to see Repeatedly Revisited Reanimating Hope in me That I could always Fall apart In arms They promise Safety Along with something Tasty Life, the way It should be Could be That I am Getting accustomed To this falling Delicious Dissolving Coming Apart at my edges At the wake Of your Mouth On my own In the soft Of this bedding I’m getting So that I can’t breathe Without the need For this whetting Of appetites Of breaking into pieces With needs that Feel more than right This tightness This brightness All across my sight Muscles relaxing while asking For more of these nights Of exertion For a life of my heart feeling safe With this person I fall apart so sweetly Knowing you keep me Collec...

I used to write things With smoke Black Sweet Like vanilla beans Seeds sewn Into the delicate corners Of the words So that the fragrance Made your eyes Water And touched The soft places In the back Of your throat An itch That made you swallow hard And ache to satisfy The ghosts My words Fed Your tongue I used to write, Write Words That melted Off my hands Dripping Like hot wax Chaos Of color And texture On bare flesh The bite Of pain Just enough To let you know You were alive You were derived From something sacred In my eyes The way my words Wove You into the tapestry Of a time You always dreamt of And I, I always meant love To exist here In the seconds Where aches lessened In the wake of Oceans breaking waves Against the stretching Sands That dropped from Glass That captured hours I used to write Away the wilt And breathe bloom To flowers Hours Spent simply inking Evenings Into skin With wet tipped quills Quivering At my will And wish I used to Do this Brew this  Mystic Magic From...

I wait patiently For something different to grow From this brittle earth

It’s strange The things That you let yourself believe When you’re empty When you’re simply One Lone Soul Almost anything Can trick you Into feeling whole A moment Is easily deceived By the greed Of want Of haunting need Fresh ache Against your teeth And he seems to be The thing To ease These hungry Gnawing Demons Inside of me Inciting pleas That make flesh flush With heat He smells right Like woods And earth And the wash On the line and I’m Stuck Hanging out to dry Cause I need this I need skin Pressed Life flowers In a book Hard Till my sweet Runs out Till my moisture Is absorbed Against his pages And it’s been ages So he seems To my unbalanced self To be my best Attempt at rekindling These flames Despite the painful Obvious truth He Will never really do He Would never Really make bones weak But in the state I hate to say It’s just so hard to see So I take a moment To go over The merit In acknowledging this truth But when you Starve for taste Almost any Fruit will do And so I Close my...

I want to try something Different Daring Baring Without the boundaries I want to be still In your presence To have you In a brand new way To be known Without The space I want your hands Warm And strong Pressed against me Eyes closed So you know What I feel like Beneath your palms No moving No doing Just slow breaths While you let yourself know The heat of my skin The softness The nearness Of us Just Still As blood fills veins And hearts beat We intimate in our innocent Exploration Of senses I want to try something Different Existing In a moment When we allow Fingertips to slip Our minds into a trance As fingerprints skim skin Enhanced By these sensations Humming All along our edges Let's do something Different Let's let skin feel something Let it take center stage Let it be alive Alert Engaged Let it sing Beneath our hands Let it heat, enraged Let it simmer Slowly down Or tingle with tantalizing chills So that we Gasp against The thrill Let's build something Before we take ...

Perhaps It was an anchor For my sanity A way To keep me safe From the demons That lay dormant Perhaps The end Opened the doors Let the waters Flood My peace And me I was but Bones At the bottom Of an ocean Soaking So long in salt I never could wash clean I always was Something bitter In their mouths My name Drying out their Tongues My smile Broken And lost Like ships My eyes Shining in a way That blocked their view Of a better life Perhaps Its only now That it all makes sense Since the end Has me washed Ashore Naked In my truth Of who I am And always was Perhaps I am The after Of their Enough