It's Zenobia

This may be  more than I bargained for more than I can bear how do I balance being  good  to someone else just when I decided  to be good to myself I'm supposed to put down  the baggage that no longer serves me , be free but somehow  along the way  I've detoured  picked up more picked up the remnants  of things  that don't work that won't work  and I  don't want  to be the reason for anyone's hurt feelings I don't want  to be responsible  for someone else when I promised I'd finally  take care of myself and maybe  I should understand  that there is nothing  and no one  out there for me but I don't want  to settle I don't want to be chosen because  someone is frozen  in place  and I'm the only option I'd rather keep walking I'd rather keep  talking  to myself  bolstering what may be  delusions  I want to be  in place I believe I'm...

It is objectively  good I could  theoretically  let it be the end all  even if it's  not the be all even if  I don't receive the heat my bones  crave I can  be practical and take  some artificial  heat  and let that be the way  I wake  and live  and sleep  at night  but I  know the truth,  what the dreams  will do  how they'll taunt me haunt me remind me  I'm beholden to my longing  and what then,  how can  I say yes when I'm not certain  I'll be ready  when the curtains close we're getting close we're letting those seconds  minutes  hours  flower and bloom  but I don't do  well with keeping things alive with standing still enough to thrive  in one singular  location It's good on paper boxes  mostly checked mind agrees  but body  is on the fence  heart is stressed  wants me  to not forget  ...