Beautiful Words

I wake 

And I know that I need

Something beautiful

Something strong and heavy and full

I need to be 

Breathed in deeply, surrounded, and enveloped

By something beautiful 

Something that presses down

On me, in me, 

over me, over me, over me, 

Until I am drowning and gasping

And praying beneath it, 

I need something beautiful 

To fill the empty spaces inside of me

To coat and caress the walls of my heart,

My self, my mind,

I've come so far

But now I know I need 

Something strong and heavy and deep

That sees and knows me,

That speaks

Only to me

Something that has made a language 

For my ears alone 

That aches for my voice alone

I can think only of this need 

For something beautiful to taste

At night, and then again when I wake

I need something beautiful to quench every ache

I need something beautiful

I need Something

To surrender to, to fall apart with

Tonight I close my eyes

And hope for my need

Of something

Beautiful