Working Words

I am working

while 

I'm hurting 

to have

a different 

point of view

of me 

of we 

of you

in the long run 

it's the wrong ones 

I'm avoiding 

or so I 

tell myself

and so I 

fell myself 

before I have a chance

to grow 

because there's a piece

of me that wholeheartedly 

believes 

that I am right 

to be afraid 

to stay safe

alone

in the dark 

with my back 

to the wall 

and chains 

on my heart

but it gets hard

bearing this weight

it gets hard 

wearing this pain 

and so 

the devil I don't know 

seems like a risk 

I should be willing

to take 

I should be willing 

to make 

sacrifices 

to have something 

like us out in the sun 

even if it kills me 

at least it's one 

day 

free 

where I

don't have to pretend 

that this darkness is a choice

where I can 

finally have a voice

I am working 

while I'm hurting 

to give myself something 

worthy 

and deserving 

of all the days I've been deprived

all the days I've been alive

without living 

present 

without giving 

I am working to be different 

to have a chance

at something

vivid 

and delicious 

something simple 

daring 

me to be 

someone awake 

someone who takes

the pieces 

and makes them art

I'm hurting yes

but yet 

I'm working

working 

wanting 

hard