Make Words...

I wanted to make love to him
Cause I … I didn’t know myself any more
And he knew me
He knew me well enough not to want me
And I wanted to know myself
Maybe not like that
But deep like he knew me
And I wanted to steal it from him
Secretly
While we made love
Like friends make amends when
They acted out of themselves
I wanted him out of himself
And into me
So I could know myself
Like a virgin
Fully freely for the first time
Cause the first time
We danced
Like we heard lyrics not words
Deep powerful ballads
Like the ones that make you cry
When you’re alone
And we did, we cried
And I wanted him like that
In tears over me
Cause he knew so much
And I could kiss the tears away
And know myself
Like he knew me
I wanted to steal it from him
While his eyes were closed
As we made love
Like poets consuming words
Greedily needing “freed” to be
A euphemism
For the extended orgasmic vision
Achieved when he delivered me
By division
Splitting me like atoms
I’d have him
Right there where I needed him
And I’d collect myself
Off his high thread count sheets
Every little liquid piece
So I could know myself like he knew me
And maybe
I could do a little soul searching
Soul purging
Of certain silent hurting
So maybe I could put things
Where they were supposed to be
Way back when
He first knew me
And I knew who I was
But I ignored his pleas to breathe
Cause I thought I could stop at enough
… I could fix things if I knew me
And right things if I knew me
If I could just take it from him
Secretly
While we made love
So I could know myself
Just enough To let him go